“Should I Stay or Should I Go?”

Divorced fathers
Divorce contemplation

Divorce Contemplation Coaching

What do you do when you wake up one day, look yourself in the mirror and hardly recognize the person staring back at you? Living in a constant state of ambivalence, doubt and indecision robs you of the moment and saps energy that you could have spent investing in your career, enjoying your children or whatever does it for you.

Divorce coaching is not just about helping people get through divorce, it's also about shrinking the divorce rate which is currently around 40% in the United States. And I know exactly where your head is going next, “What about the children?”  Well, yes, if a divorce is in your future you want to leave no rock unturned, you want to put your head on that pillow every night knowing damn well that this is the lesser of two evils for the kids. 

I am not a mind reader but if you are considering divorce some of the following thoughts are lurking around the dark corners in your mind:

  • Something feels “off” between you and your spouse

  • You are tired of walking on eggshells

  • It’s a relief when the two of you have time apart

  • You make excuses for his/her bad behavior

  • You fantasize about being alone

  • If you have children, you would not want this for them

  • Your friends/family have concerns

  • If fear for your children/money/being alone were not an issue, you would have been long gone

  • The 3 A’s, addiction, adultery and abuse are in your marriage..need I say more?

Sound familiar?

Look, I am not going to lie, I was in your shoes once and I wouldn’t want to be back there. In fact, it was the catalyst for my becoming a divorce coach, to be the person I needed back then. But here is what I can tell you, if you have any doubt, or any hope, divorce coaching can help you decide whether you want to recommit to your marriage OR divorce with confidence, clarity and peace. Either way, a wonderful life is still within reach. But now is not the time to bury your head in the sand and hope you wake up one day with a problem that has miraculously resolved itself. 

  • I am so glad you asked and I will answer it with my favorite metaphor. Imagine you are going on a trip, you need to pack, get through the airport chaos, and make your flight. Your therapist is going to help you sort through all that baggage, figure out what to pack and what to leave behind. Your divorce coach, on the other hand, is going to help you fight the crowds at the airport and make it to your flight. In other words, therapy is about coming to terms with our past, coaching is about taking some action and getting you from A to B.

  • Another great question and an important one at that. A divorce coach will provide education and resources to simplify the process and make your divorce a little less intimidating. A divorce coach will absolutely not offer legal advice or suggest legal strategies. And let’s not forget the obvious, you get to unpack your worries and thoughts with your divorce coach at a fraction of the hourly rate your lawyer charges.

  • Coaching is not covered by insurance, but I offer a 10% discount for packages paid in full.